Love Without Spending

So today is the big day to express your love for that special someone in your life and by now you have been reminded by a few thousands commercials that you should get them something.  So what am I buying my lovely wife of over 13 years of marriage?

Nothing.  Not one flower, chocolate, card, dinner out or movieUtterly nothing.

You see I realized something a while back.  If I only remember to express my love to my wife only one day a year, I would be divorced years ago by now.  So I don’t wait for a particular day to show her that I love her.  I tell her when ever it crosses my mind and I show it by daily displays of affection.

Yet it doesn’t stop there I’m also nice to my wife about the little things.  I’ll remember some days to bring her up her first cup of coffee so she doesn’t have to get out of bed.  I’ll fill her a wine glass without being asked or I’ll get something for the kids at supper so she can continue to sit down and enjoy her meal.  Or I’ll play with the kids so she can finish her book with only a chapter left.  These aren’t big things, but they mean something to her so I do them because I love her.

Another factor for both of us is we have never made a big deal out of Valentine’s Day.  It was never anything important to either of us growing up so we don’t make a big deal out it in our house.  Our kids won’t get any presents from us today, but they will have no doubt when they fall asleep that they are loved.  With every giggle, joke, touch, hug and kiss they are told repeatedly every day that we love them.

So yes, celebrate love, but don’t worry about the stuff unless if matters to your significant other. When in doubt, ask BEFORE that big day on what matters most and focus on that. Perhaps a single rose and you singing badly to their favorite song is more meaningfully than two dozen roses. Or instead focus on being nice and showing love daily, you might find that just pays off and they will even forgive the occasionally lapse of flowers. 😉

3 thoughts on “Love Without Spending”

  1. I completely agree. Showing love is an every day activity where we acknowledge each other and do the little things and sometimes big things for each other. Sometimes this is more reciprocal than others and that’s OK too.

    I have learned to play bridge because my husband loves to play and he wanted a consistent partner – even though I don’t like playing cards and I have found it really hard to learn. I have only stuck with it because I love him and he really enjoys the game. In the first year of learning it was OK, in the second year when I had to play at club level I hated it. Now its OK again as I feel I’m playing to a reasonable standard.

    E-cards are only great is they are in addition to showing your love in practical ways. And if you really mean them you will find lovely ones to send on a regular basis – ones which are meaningful to your partner.

  2. Yes, learning each other’s expectations is key. Even when showing love daily, there may be an expectation of a little something extra on Valentine’s Day. I definitely like to mark the day, myself, regardless of how loving a partner has or hasn’t been the rest of the year.

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