Posted by Tim Stobbs on November 25, 2009
Well this blog already deals with one common taboo: money. We discuss a lot about money: spending it, saving it, investing it, how it makes you feel, why we spend it on some things rather than others. So today let’s branch out a bit and double up on the taboo: how much money do you spend on sex in a month?
Now depending on your mind set you might consider that I just ask you if you use a prostitute and how often, which I suppose you could answer, but that really isn’t what I’m getting at. I’m instead wondering how much money do people put towards getting sex since most people would agree that sex helps on the whole being happy in life. Now obviously your costs will vary depending on your relationship status.
- Single. This category likely takes the most money on average to get sex. Dating isn’t cheap. There is the nights out with dinner, perhaps a show or the bar. Depending on how serious you are there can be the little gifts that show you are thoughtful. Not to mention birth control like the pill or condoms. All of that costs money and is related to how much much you spend on sex (either directly or indirectly).
- Serious. I’m including engaged folks and those that move in together (but are under their first year living together) in this category. Your spending on sex now may actually reduce a bit at this point, after all if you share a place you can now share costs which should hopefully offset on your date nights. Not to mention that having sex is just easier since there is less logistics involved in the whole: your place or mine debate. If you go the marriage route let’s face the fact buying a engagement ring is rather like buying a long term bond: you hoping for some long term payout of sex and affection for a large lump sum of cash.
- Early Marriage or Common Law: In your early years of the steady portion of your relationship your costs will dramatically differ depending on if you get married or stay common law. Marriage is an expensive thing to do for trying to secure sex. The wedding itself is expensive, but it is offset by some gifts and the honeymoon is likely the most expensive thing you will spend on sex in your entire life. Then given the divorce rate and the costs associated with not getting sex you have to consider marriage a speculative investment on sex at best. Meanwhile if you go the common law route life can be much easier and less costly on sex. Yet of course our decision to get married or not has nothing to do with logic, but rather emotion so people will keep getting married despite the poor investment it is for a lot of people.
- Longer Term Marriage or Common Law: Now let’s put in those people that have been together for seven years or longer here (where you chance of splitting up drops off). At this point your spending on sex might be almost non existent especially if you have small children. Just the logistics of having sex is hard to do with working around kid’s bedtimes, your libido and the rest of your life can be hard. If you don’t have kids then things could be easier having sex, but likely your direct seduction costs are low compared to when you were single. So on a purely financial front getting to a long term relationship and staying in one can be potentially be a good cost saving strategy on sex. So if your dating a personal finance geek that might be an interesting way to proposing getting more serious: “Honey, let’s reduce our costs on sex and move in together?”
How much do I spend on sex each month? To be honest I don’t have a clue. I’ve never figured it out and I likely won’t in the future. Yet I’m firmly in category four with nine years of marriage. Yet I can say I think I should be spending more on sex than I do now. Dates are an important thing to do (from a sex and relationship point of view) and I’ve been guilty of not doing enough of them lately. So perhaps I do need a new line item on my budget: “date night” or perhaps just “sex.” At least I know I’ll be having an interesting discussion with my wife after this post.
**Just to be absolutely clear this post was written with a strong humour element, so don’t take everything I wrote literally**